Time Experience Thoughts

I. Her wisdom’s words – spoken long ago, but now fully quieted -- Still sound in our ears, pointing out the way. II. The binding power of her love’s selfless acts – given for so long, but now all bound up -- Still echo in our hearts, blessing us today. III. In all our days of need she was always there for us. Now she’s just . . . there. In all her days alone she sits there silently -- without us. Soon we’ll be there. For now, her communication is Soundless and unspoken, Dulled, muted, and verbally stifled Till that Great Day when none shall be voiceless. IV. Sitting all by herself, with Heaven alone looking down on her -- and into her soul, She’s stares out the window, Alone again. Now together with her again, Sometimes she stares blankly straight ahead, but then in a moment, straight into our eyes. We sit with and talk to and walk with her – looking back deep into her eyes and heart. Too infrequently, the silent sound is Broken with a Hello or a (heart-rending...

Growing Up I saw unconditional love, all my life. I knew my parents loved me. Never doubted; never. Loving Becky I could feel something deep within; something new and real -- when I spoke the words to my sweetheart, “I love you.” Overwhelming; shockingly overwhelming. And I meant it. My whole soul was enlivened with true, heaven-yearning emotion. Becoming Aware of Eternal Things I knew it was the right thing to do -- when I prayed and spoke with Him about the restored Gospel. I should join. As I knelt, I already knew what the answer was. Overwhelming rightness. Peace. Go forth. In a moment, I became awakened to the implications of Joseph’s mission. I intuited the reality of his mission and of his vision; that his enemies, and those who would tear him down, that the answer would always be, He was God’s Prophet. No matter what; no matter what was said against him, or about him. I knew. Looking to the Temple with Becky I knew in my heart and in my mind what I should do, as I knelt to ask ...

Gunn Park Summer 2008 Becky and I visited my Mom in Fort Scott, Kansas. We walked at Gunn Park in the mornings. (Pictures from the morning and afternoon.)

So many Generations have seen these very days of yours, Where each eternal moment reveals His divine ways and course. And now, the New Life being brought forth by you both, Creates, in us all, renewed hope of our own rebirth and growth. We see the two of you – as one – and now three,* Are already bound together , in one, eternally. And this New Little One, sent forth by those from above, Will bring new ways to see . . . new ways to be . . . and new ways for us to love. Eternity has just reached down and touched your inmost soul, As this new Generation even now rejoices and further completes the whole. Scott L. Vanatter, mid-October 2002 (Poem written in anticipation of Ryan’s upcoming birth.) * This poem still works, even though they are now more than just three.

Our days become decades, Our years, eternities, Our minds and heart ever more one. Your smile becomes my beacon, Your love, my very life. Your deepest soul enlivens me. Our eyes and our lives, even more closely united, Your face, even more the sight I yearn to see. Your soul touches mine at the very moment I want to feel . . . As now and throughout all eternity. Scott L. Vanatter, 20 July 2004 (Poem written for Becky's 50th birthday.)

Since we took Carrie, Kyle, Sean, and Ryan to the airport last evening . . . "there's a kind of hush all over the [house]." The toys are put away, the boys have flown away, but the joys will never go away. So much love.

I drew this picture of a pencil -- done in pencil -- in late 1979 as I was about to graduate from Cal State University, Fullerton. (The pencil pictured is about 18 inches long. This picture is on the wall immediatley to the left of my desk.)